REAL Marriage

Today is National Chili Day so go out for chili for this week’s date.  Or you can always make an at home date and cook your own chili together.

A REAL date a week builds a REAL marriage.

I just received a fact sheet from Life Innovations and decided to pass on some of the information.  Preparing for your marriage with a premarital program can reduce your chance of divorce 30%.  Couples who participated in premarital education has a 79% improvement in marital outcomes compared to couples who did not particpate in premarital education.  Thsoe who participated in the PREPARE program showed in improvement in 10 out of 13 relationship categories.

Premarital preparation is an investment in your marriage, your health, your wealth, and the children you will have.  Make the investment and reap the benefits.

“We must not, in trying to think about how we can make a big difference, ignore the small daily differences we can make which, over time, add up to big differences that we often cannot foresee.  Marian Wright Edelman

REAL Love Notes, an e-mail to say “Hi,” inexpensive gifts, and back scratches are some of the small things that really add up in your marriage.  Trust in the power of the small things to help you make your marriage REAL.

Use the weather in your area to inspire your REAL Love Note this week.  Where I live the daffodils are starting to bloom so I could put daffodils on the front and write about our blooming love on the inside.  Some of you are still snowed under where you are so you could put snowflakes on the front of your note and your message can take the theme of your love being as pure as the new fallen snow.

Be creative and have a good time. Remember, REAL Love Notes are deposits in the love bank.

Fill  your social network with people who are supportive of marriage in general and your marriage in particular.  Support their marriages as well.

Remaining faithful is essential to keeping your marriage REAL.

Getting ideas from someone else can take the pressure off of always having to think of what to do on your own.  Today, on MSN, I ran across an article called 23 Ways to Celebrate Your Marriage.  Give these ideas a try and they will help you keep your marriage REAL.

This Saturday, February 23, 2008, is Curling is Cool day.  For this week’s date go curling (it is the sport on ice that uses stones with a handle and little brooms to get the stone in a target).  If there is no curling in your area try bocce ball.

For many of you one, or both, of these activities are new to you.  Trying new things is one of the ways to rekindle some of the same type of feelings you had when first dating.

A REAL date a week builds a REAL marriage.

Confessions of an Adulterous Christian Woman by Lyndell Hetrick Holtz will not take you long to read.  It is 190 pages and they go quickly.  This book is especially helpful for Christians who have been unfaithful.  Mrs. Holtz helps those who have been unfaithful to their spouse recognize their unfaithfulness to God and helps them reestablish a right relationship with God so that they can reestablish their relationship with their spouse.

Mrs. Holtz describes the account of how she went from a faithful wife to an adulterous wife and back to a faithful restored relationship with her husband.  She describes at length how she had not relied on God and came to realize how important it is to rely on God.

The book does not have much in the way of step-by-step information for those who are in an unfaithful situation.  This is not the first book to read if you or your spouse have been unfaithful (read Not Just Friends by Shirley Glass first).  However, this book is an important addition to the recovery process for anyone from a Christian background.

Whether you or your spouse has been unfaithful or not it is important for you to have a Faithfulness Plan.  Plan on staying faithful and you are more likely to reach that goal.

With all of the election news and primaries going on you can use a political theme in this week’s note.  Let your spouse know that he or she has “100%” approval rating with you or at least a “high approval rating.”  You could tell your spouse that his or her “numbers are up in the polls” or that you are a “pledged delegate” for your spouse.  Decorate the note in colors appropriate to your spouse’s political leanings.

REAL love notes are deposits in the love bank.

“Perfect love sometimes does not come till the first grandchild.”  Welsh Proverb

When you work at your marriage you can enjoy the journey.  By working together you often forget that the love is not perfect because you are enjoying what you are doing in trying to reach the goal.

Strive everyday to be REAL in your marriage.